I'd like to get four people who do cart wheels very good, and make a cart.
Mitch Hedberg
More from: Mitch Hedberg
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I was walking along and this chair came flying past me, and another, and another, and I thought, man, is this gonna be a good night. -
A vigorous five-mile walk will do more good for an unhappy but otherwise healthy adult than all the medicine and psychology in the world. -
When you are angry or frustrated, what comes out? Whatever it is, it's a good indication of what you're made of. -
Like every other good thing in this world, leisure and culture have to be paid for. Fortunately, however, it is not the leisured and the cultured who have to pay. -
Thunder is good, thunder is impressive but it is lightning that does the work.
More quotes by Mitch Hedberg
- Why is Cloud 9 so amazing? What is wrong with Cloud 8? That joke came off the top of my head, and the top of my head ain't funny!
- I wanted to buy a candle holder, but the store didn't have one. So I got a cake.
- I was at this casino minding my own business, and this guy came up to me and said, 'You're gonna have to move, you're blocking a fire exit.' As though if there was a fire, I wasn't gonna run. If you're flammible and have legs, you are never blocking a fire exit.
- I know a lot about cars, man. I can look at any car's headlights and tell you exactly which way it's coming.
- Is a hippopotamus a hippopotamus, or just a really cool Opotamus?